The Taming of the Fox

A Short Play by Gabriel Echo Miller

CHARACTERS

EDMOND- an inchworm and childhood friend to Rover

ROVER- a tortoise and childhood friend to Edmond

DUSK- an eagle, the fairest creature in the wood

MEKA- a bear and Bink’s goon

BINK- a fox, the most mischievous critter around

REEVE- a large and old crazy bat

XAVIER- an old grumpy ant

ALICE- a very friendly mouse

ACT 1

SCENE 1.1: Inside an oak cottage, Edmond is laying on a bed staring at the ceiling and Rover is hunched over his writing desk working. Outside there is an old forest. In the cabin there is also arranged a wood-burning stove, a kitchen table, various cabinets, and a lantern which hangs from the ceiling. As Edmond begins to speak Rover is obviously engrossed in his writing.

EDMOND: Isn’t the lantern funny?

ROVER: No, I can’t see how a lantern would amuse, Edmond.

EDMOND: I mean, look, it sits and swings there all day, totally useless, and then just as we need it we go to bed.

ROVER: Yes that’s what a lantern is for.

EDMOND: But don’t you think it ever wonders why it exists if we only use it to sleep through its use?

ROVER: Look, I don’t think the lantern much cares.

[They are silent. The only sound is Rover’s pen upon his work]

EDMOND: Why do we even have a lantern if we sleep as soon as we need it?

[Rover puts down his pen heavily]

ROVER: Why does anyone have a lantern?

EDMOND: Good question I suppose. Emergencies?

ROVER: Shouldn’t we have all sorts of other things for an emergency then?

EDMOND: Good point. Why do we have lanterns then?

ROVER: Well the same reason we have everything I guess.

EDMOND: Because we like having things?

ROVER: No, because other people have them.

EDMOND: Wait, are you telling me we only have things because other people have those same things? Then why was the first thing bought in order to bring about the other things?

ROVER: Look, everyone has a lantern and therefore we have a lantern. Cabins need lanterns, that’s just the way things are.

EDMOND: Fair point.

[Rover nods, finally happy the debate is over. Picks up his pen and is about to start writing.]

EDMOND: But wait, we have beds to sleep in and stoves to cook with. So those things have purposes.

ROVER: Well, firstly a lantern isn’t without its uses, it sheds light even if we almost never use that light since we go to bed, but that’s not why we have one. Just like those other reasons aren’t why we have stoves and beds. We could just as easily sleep on the ground and eat raw food. Carrots and leaves taste just as good raw as cooked, don’t they?

EDMOND: Hmm, that’s true. So what you want to say is that we only have things because other people have things?

ROVER: Yes

EDMOND: Then why do other people have things?

ROVER: Because we have things.

EDMOND: Hmm… Isn’t that circular?

ROVER: Yes

EDMOND: Aren’t circles self-defeating?

ROVER: Everything is self-defeating according to someone.

EDMOND: I can’t argue that.

ROVER: Well, you could but that would only prove my point.

EDMOND: Fair.

(Pause)

EDMOND: Wouldn’t that make the lantern sad?

ROVER: Why?

EDMOND: Because it doesn’t seem to have a purpose.

ROVER: Are you sad?

EDMOND: Not really.

ROVER: And what’s your purpose?

EDMOND: I don’t know.

ROVER: So why would the lantern be sad without knowing its purpose?

EDMOND: I guess I can’t see why it would be then.

ROVER: Why are you so worried about a lantern anyway?

EDMOND: Because it’s funny, just swinging up there. I wonder how often it contemplates its current status.

ROVER: Probably not often considering it’s a lantern.

EDMOND: You don’t think lanterns contemplate things?

ROVER: No, I don’t.

EDMOND: Don’t you think we contemplate things?

ROVER: Not really any more than a lantern would.

EDMOND: Aren’t we contemplating something right now?

ROVER: Aren’t we just stating our opinions?

EDMOND: Aren’t our opinions changing?

ROVER: Isn’t the change just a byproduct of two different opinions coming together rather than new realizations?

EDMOND: I suppose that’s true. We do tend to just state what we believe or adapt to what we hear. But then, isn’t there some original belief which spurs the rest?

ROVER: Well, it’s possible I suppose, but we don’t have them anymore do we? Our opinions come from other opinions which are brought upon by our opinions.

EDMOND: Isn’t that circular too?

ROVER: Yes.

EDMOND: Interesting.

(Pause)

EDMOND: (sitting up) Well, I’m over lanterns I think, want to head out?

ROVER: Yeah, sure

-END SCENE-

SCENE 1.2: Out in the woods near a pond we see Xavier taking a drink from the water. Bink and Meka stroll in from left stage.

BINK: Hey there Xavier, how’s your day been?

MEKA: Yeah, how’s it been there antman?

XAVIER: Well, now, neither of your’ business, that’s how.

BINK: Aww, come on now old grumpman. I’m just being polite.

MEKA: Yeah, we just asking you a question.

XAVIER: I don’t much care for questions so why don’t you take that curiosity and your well manners elsewhere?

BINK: Now that ain’t nice is it Meka?

MEKA: Nahuh, antman is being rude.

BINK: And nobody gets to be rude to me, right Meka?

MEKA: Ain’t nobody else I’ll smash em’ in.

BINK: So sounds like Xav boy needs to be taught a lesson, huh?

MEKA: Something big I reckon.

XAVIER: Hey now, if either you two goons lay hands on me you’ll regret it.

BINK: Oh no, little ant is threating us Meka.

MEKA: Little bugboy got himself a proud shoulder.

XAVIER: I’m serious, I’ll bite.

BINK: Why don’t you grab him up Meka and we’ll show him a good time.

MEKA: But, Bink… He said he’d bite.

BINK: You’re a bear Meka, pick him up.

MEKA: Right

[Meka picks up Xavier in his mouth]

XAVIER: Now let me down, you hear? You’ll regret this!

BINK: Oh shush itty bug, Meka isn’t pass eating a little ant like you.

XAVIER: I didn’t shush in the termite wars of 42’ and I sure ain’t shushin’ to you Bink!

BINK: Oh, Xav, you crack me up, ya know? Real, true hero over here trying to tell me what to do. Hey, how about you throw him in Meka.

[Meka hesitates for a minute but then, with a push from Bink, he throws Xavier into the pond]

XAVIER: Hey, no! I can’t swim!

BINK: Sounds like your problem and not mine. That’s what happens when you mess with me. Let’s go Meek.

MEKA: We just going to leave him there? Won’t he die?

BINK: I’m sure he’ll be fine. Besides, gotta teach him somehow. Now come on!

[Exit Bink and Meka on left, enter Bink and Roland on right. Xavier struggles to stay afloat.]

ROVER: Hey, what’s going on here!?

EDMOND: Xavier is drowning, we gotta help him!

[Edmond and Rover rush over to help Xavier out of the pond. After Xavier is done spitting up water he talks.]

XAVIER: It was that Bink fella, that mean fox. He had his goony bring me over here and throw me in. Told me it was some lesson.

ROVER: Likely. He’s always causing issues.

XAVIER: Helpless? Well, I tell you I’m not that, I would’ve kicked that boy up and down the forest if my damned old exo-skeleton wasn’t so sore all the time. I say, he’d be one sore butt in the morn, and that’s a fact. There’s no respect around here, none like there used to be. Ridiculous, being thrown in a pond by some young hoodwinker like that fox. Fie!

ROVER: Something has got to be done, that’s for sure.

EDMOND: Reeve will know what to do!

ROVER: What’s that old coot gonna do?

EDMOND: Well, we have to do something.

XAVIER: I agree, sometimes it’s the crazy ones that know the most.

EDMOND: Fantastic, let’s go.

ROVER: Ughh, this isn’t going to end.

-END SCENE-

SCENE 1.3: Bink and Meka come into stage again, from left. Ali is sitting by a small maple tree, knitting a little mouse sweater.

BINK: Lookie here, I’m king of the wood, prince of pranks!

MEKA: You sure are. Gave that ant what was coming to him.

BINK: Ah, isn’t today splendid Meek? Isn’t it grand to be on top? Oh look, another hapless wood folk awaiting us. What foul game shall we play today Meka?

[Alice continues to knit, unaware of the coming danger]

BINK: Aye there good ma’am! And how goes the day? Won’t you kneel before your duke? Won’t you bow to the forest-lord? Aye! Won’t you even look up! I am your master, bard of these here woodlands! Listen up underling!

ALICE: Hmm? Oh, Bink, what are you doing here?

BINK: Ha, fie, wouldn’t you like to jest? What am I doing here? What are you doing without a bent knee?

ALICE: I’m sorry? What am I supposed to have?

BINK: Oh, and aren’t you a sorrowful lot. Aren’t you aware of my strength? The peasant does not question the knight! The servant not the lord! Meka, break down Alice’s tree if she will not show their lord some respect.

ALICE: What? No! Don’t break my house!

BINK: What a joke, how a jester stands before us. Meka do as I say and I’ll take care of Ms. Mousehead.

[Bink grabs up Alice, holding her as she struggles in his hands.]

MEKA: Her house Bink?

BINK: Yes, her house, if that’s what you could call this rut.

[Meka hits the tree with his shoulder, it cracks but does not fall down]

BINK: Can you do nothing?

[Bink scratches Meka, forcing him to jump and crash into the tree. It uproots and falls to the ground.]

ALICE: Nooo! Not my home. How could you!?

BINK: Let that be your lesson today then, when a king commands you had better listen. And with that I’ll give you a salutations and a leave.

[Bink and Meka leave stage, Edmond Rover, and Xavier enter from right. They are mumbling something about lanterns. Alice is crying next to her ruined home.]

EDMOND: Look there, Rover, our friend Alice is in distraught.

ROVER: No doubt the cause of our good friend, Bink.

EDMOND: What is bothering you so, Alice?

[Alice can hardly get the words out. Her little sweater is discarded on the ground next to her.]

ALICE: Oh, that nasty Bink tore down my house. He had Meka rip it right out of the ground just because we wouldn’t bow to him.

EDMOND: Now surely that’s unfair if anything. He surely does need to be dealt with.

ALICE: Ohhh, what will we do?

EDMOND: Well, as a matter of fact we’re heading to Reeve right now in order to figure that out. Would you want to join Ali? I’m sure a walk would make you feel better.

ALICE: You really think he can help?

EDMOND: Reeve might be a little batty but I’m sure he’ll be able to help us.

ROVER: Yes, and we should be off before Bink causes more troubles.

[Alice nods and the troop begins to walk across stage to leave. Edmond begins to talk.]

EDMOND: Maybe Ali can help with out lantern troubles?

ALICE: What troubles?

ROVER: Don’t ask.

EDMOND: I’m just wondering, why do you think we have lanterns? Xavier seems to think we have them because our animal brains desire light, even when we don’t need it.

XAVIER: It’s simple really, your subconscious needs light. You’re hard-wired.

[Alice is puzzled, but she eventually chimes in]

ALICE: I think we have them to light our homes.

EDMOND: But we sleep at night, so why would we need light?

ALICE: What if I like staying up late, then wouldn’t I have a reason to have a lantern?

EDMOND: Do you stay up late?

ALICE: No.

EDMOND: And do you own a lantern?

[The characters leave stage, the conversation fades away.]

ALICE: Well, yes.

EDMOND: Isn’t that odd?

ALICE: I guess. But supposing I do want to stay up late or supposing I’m the kind of person who stays up late?

EDMOND: So you have a lantern because someone else has one that uses it for staying up late?

ALICE: I guess I have one in case I’m that sort of person.

EDMOND: But you’re not?

ALICE: But I could be.

ROVER: Exactly as I said earlier. All because of others.

-END SCENE-

-END ACT 1-

ACT 2

SCENE 2.1: Inside a rotting out willow tree. Our four adventurers cautiously walk past the spider webs that hang from the ceilings. They come upon a giant upside down figure. As Edmond speaks giant wings stretch out and we see Reeve hanging upside down in the hallow

EDMOND: Reeve, there you are. How goes the day?

REEVE: oh, and inchworm my adored? How goes the night most evidentially.

EDMOND: Of course, good friend, how goes the nights?

REEVE: Halfway round the right way and that’s not one which sorrows.

EDMOND: Ah, good then it seems?

REEVE: The moons up and that’s the truth. Dark skies filled with wing-flaps, mouse over-belly on shade-blanket grounds and a sizable mosquito too.

EDMOND: I’m glad to hear that, then. It’s been too long for me to visit. I do so wish I could make it this way more often.

REEVE: Aye but an inchworm as inches, though not footés, can only go so far as the toe will let him, will it not? And aye, but you’d only be indebted as you are and not as can be determined by sole-sorrows like old bat-holes in willow trees.

EDMOND: Surely right man. Surely. And I'm glad you understand.

[Alice pokes Rover, not taking her eyes of the giant bat. Rover clears his throat and begins.]

ROVER: Edmond, don’t we have something to ask Reeve?

EDMOND: Oh, yes, of course. Reeve, can you answer me a question?

REEVE: As can the stone be seen with the sound.

EDMOND: What do you think the purpose of a lantern is?

REEVE: Well, now, that’s the rotten apple of the bunch isn’t it?

ROVER: That’s not what we were going to ask Edmond.

REEVE: No, no, I assume not by tortoise companions, neigh, neigh, I expect nothing less than lanterns on such a dark hour as this one. Look here now…

ROVER: No, I mean we have another question.

REEVE: …if it so be that lanterns hang in a cabin then it so be’ith that a star must shine among the brown-dark veils of the night sky. So, in this case, if so far as you’ll allow, that against the moon we have the sun and against that we have stars. Now the stars are the interesting bit, you see, for they give the real insight into a lamp-post which besides, according to the logic we’ve discovered, is beside a lantern in shape and stature; so a star is born which must have been born else it would not have been created so purposeful…

[Rover nudges Edmond]

ROVER: we really must ask about Bink. He could go forever about this lantern business.

EDMOND: Oh, but aren’t you listening? How am I supposed to interrupt him right before he’s able to answer the question?

XAVIER: Sounds like gibberish to me.

REEVE: …So the stars are key, right? Of course. Look here, a star is there for nighttime even when nighttime is unfortunately dim, even for an old night-barker like myself. Suppose I use a lantern then? I do assume I wouldn’t need one since I have foresight and yet there it hangs in the cabin, or in the night sky if you follow me, resting upon the intention of use…

ROVER: Really though, we don’t have this much time.

EDMOND: Very well. Reeve!

REEVE: …And this intention most certainly leads to an unuse, which is saddening in the least of senses, but not so far gone as despair can bring one. And how? Might you ask? Can the lantern lead to despair at its own purpose or unpurpose, that is, which is not used in the use of its kind. Aye, but yes…

EDMOND: REEVE! REEVE!

REEVE: …Then after the lantern will stand to show a bearer the way, a greater mind. So in that something which was achieved through unuse is achieved through the use, or not use, of a lantern and a star which will give a thought. Aye and that’s it! Hmmm, what was that Ed-inch?

EDMOND: Ah, there you are. Good fellow, I do wish to continue the talk about lanterns but it will have to wait until another day.

REEVE: Pity, that.

XAVIER: What a loon

REEVE: A bat, by nature.

ROVER: Yes, well, right now we don’t have time. For we need help with BINK the Fox. He recently seems to have taken the forest as his playground. Even more than usual. He’s wreaking havoc and we need a way to stop him.

REEVE: What troubles the birds?

EDMOND: Nothing as long as you bother not with him, I think. The birds fly too high.

ROVER: Yes, but we still need your help in deciding what to do with him. If you don’t help all of us ground critters are going to suffer. We need him to stop causing so many problems.

REEVE: Ah! I’ve gotten an understanding now.

ROVER: Thank mercy.

REEVE: Thirdly I suggest we take the rascal and show him a pond which he may fall into and fourthly give the boy here a skin. Firstly I want a mirror and sixthly I want a pill. I think we could finally put to rest the issue when, on a second thought, we make a fox-skin out of the mouth of young ALICE and at last, by fifth token, we lord the lordships manor. As a finale, in accord to the sevenths vision, we marry the DUSK. And then after we have our conclusion. Elegant as the wind on a cool breeze. That’s what I’d do.

ROVER: Oh, why would we come here?

EDMOND: No, no, he’s got a point.

[Alice, Rover, Xavier, and even Reeve turn to stare at Edmond in disbelief.]

ROVER: What?

XAVIER: How did you get anything from that?

EDMOND: I’ve got a plan. Thank you and good morrow loft-wing, I do hope we meet soon.

REEVE: And I the same as thee. Night and a bed!

-END SCENE-

SCENE 2.2: The four of them are back near Alice’s torn down house. The four of them are all whispering vigorously.

EDMOND: So you understand the plan?

ALICE: Yes, I think I have it.

ROVER: I don’t know how you got this from that bat…

EDMOND: Weren’t you listening?

XAVIER: That bat’s been upside down for too long.

EDMOND: As long as we all understand the plan now.

ALICE: Yes, but wait, what if he asks about her feelings?

EDMOND: Just brighten up the details some, alright? It’ll be fine. You just smooth talk him a little.

ALICE: Got it.

[The other three nod and hide behind a nearby tree. Bink and Meka enter stage.]

MEKA: Oh look, that mouse girl is still next to her house. Bet she’s a sad one.

BINK: Most definitely Meek. Let’s pay her a visit and see if she learned her lesson. There you are, and how goes the house?

ALICE: Not well and I am most sorry for how I treated you earlier Bink. It was rude, I should have known you were stronger than me.

BINK: Well… Yes… Yes, of course. I’m glad you’ve learned.

ALICE: Oh yes, you are obviously my superior. I was foolish to think anything else. It must have just been my jealousy that made me act in such a way.

BINK: Jealousy?

ALICE: Oh, I am sorry, I did not mean for that to slip. I should not have said anything.

BINK: No, no, now what are you jealous of?

ALICE: I can’t say, it is not mine to tell.

BINK: Now, didn’t you already learn to respect me?! If I tell you to answer me you had better or else I’ll get Meka to show you right.

ALICE: Yes, of course, I’m sorry again. I did not mean to offend. It’s just that I heard, from some friends, that Dusk has of late begun to desire your company. I am jealous because I too wish I had someone who would love me so.

BINK: DUSK? The eagle?

ALICE: Her, yes. I heard she said she wishes you would notice her more often. She said only in this way would her life be complete.

BINK: It can’t be. Dusk, the most gorgeous and vibrant of all eagles. Liking me? Loving me, even? A sly fox is nothing to the majesty of the eagle. Yet, I am the duke, I am the lord of lies and prince of pranks. Perhaps her most elegant ears have heard of my tales. Yes, Yes, how can I blame her for I am quite a fetch. I am orange like the rising sun, sleek like the dark of night. My guile is unmatched and the shimmer on my fur unrivaled in the forest. Yes, yes, of course. She must have fallen for me, seeing me glimmer below the trees. And you, Alice, you are sure of her love?

ALICE: Why, only by ear my lord. Only by ear.

BINK: Well ear is all I would have either way. Meka, I’ll go at once to her side and reciprocate her feelings of woe. I’ll need, I’ll need flowers. You stay here for you are too fat to climb the trees.

MEKA: I don’t think Dusk would—

BINK: Ha, you a bear trying to imagine the mind of the wonderful eagle. Stay put, I say, and wait for my return.

MEKA: I just think Alice might be—

BINK: Dusk, Dusk, you silly. Not Alice the rodent. Dusk the heaven soarer, the sky-scrapper.

[Meka looks down at Alice who shrugs.]

MEKA: Okay, Bink, I’ll wait here.

BINK: Do you think I care?! Ah, I’m ecstatic!

[Bink exists stage in a frenzy. Xavier, Edmond, and Rover burst out laughing from behind the tree.]

MEKA: That wasn’t very nice, you know.

ROVER: Ahh, he had it coming. Besides, I see he slashed you.

EDMOND: Yes, that should get him. Dusk is far too proud and wise to take Bink as hers. He will only go and make a fool of himself in front of her and then he’ll have a taste of his jests.

ROVER: A prank for the prankster.

ALICE: I don’t know, I agree with Meka. It was a little mean.

XAVIER: Fooie, that pranking devil had it coming.

[Exist Edmond, Rover, and Xavier]

ALICE: I do so fear what could come of this foul play. Something stinks in mine nose which does so far deceive my heart. He is deserving yet, by my action, am I not also? If only we could reason with the fox rather than hurt his pride, for a hurt fellow can only be trusted to hurt another.

MEKA: Yet, to do? He slashed my flesh and forced down the tree. He was cruel and cruelity comes of thee. If a prank is what he must have then a prank he will earn.

ALICE: I only hope that days come when such misery is not felt in these woods, when pranks are not our livelihood.

MEKA: But now, it’s done, and nothing can be done to change it. All we can do is make amends and move past it. Alice, would you like help with you tree?

ALICE: Yes, thank you. It would be quite a lot of work all alone.

-END SCENE-

SCENE 2.3: Bink climbs up a great pine tree, dark green and vibrant against the elms, oaks, and maples which stand aside it. Atop there sits perched a great eagle, beautiful and powerful against the blue sky. We see BINK with flowers in his mouth huffing as he calms down after the climb. Dusk stares at him, head cocked sideways, confused.

BINK: Dusk, I have come in good faith for I have heard of your heart.

DUSK: Heard my heart? The beat?

BINK: Beat? Why, yes, in some way. I come because I hear your beat pertains a certain way which mine dost beat also.

DUSK: Yes, in the fashion which hearts beat.

BINK: In the fashion which they tend towards, of course. For yours has matched rhythm with mine and I stand here now to say mine wishes to share the score with yours.

DUSK: You wish to share the same heartbeat with me?

BINK: Come now, no more jests. I know it is hard to say. I am too beautiful to even imagine. I know that you have waited long to hear these words and it must seem a dream to you now, but her I stand, atop your perch, to give back what you have always felt. I am only sorry I did not see it earlier, though I should have guessed with a tail like mine and the sly shape of my ears pointed so high above my brow that you would have fallen so easily.

DUSK: I am not sure what you are trying to mean, Bink.

BINK: Well that I am here to give back my love to your infatuation. Here I lay flowers for you as a sign that my feelings are true. No longer must you wait with woe on your tongue and sadness set in your heart. No longer will the muse play your strings or butterflies upset your gully. For I am here to love you as you love me.

DUSK: I believe you have been amused with, Bink.

BINK: Surely not. I swear this is no dream, there is no reason to restrain. I know it is hard to believe but I am not a man with such high standards. I can lower to you if you are courageous enough to wish for heights like mine.

DUSK: You can lower yourself?

BINK: No, I mean, yes, I can love you. I do love you. I know you love me and I wish to reciprocate it.

DUSK: I do not love you. You have been pranked and have now made a fool of yourself in front of me. Lower yourself? As if you could dream to raise to me. I am the soaring eagle, the majesty of the sky while you are but a pretty boy on the forest ground. To me you are nothing but an overgrown orange rat. I do not take kindly to your blown head.

BINK: Fooled!? No, you do not love?

DUSK: No.

BINK: What idiocy am I then? How hurt am I. How angry am I. But who? Not Alice, for sure, she is too nice to lie to me in this way.

DUSK: I expect the ground folk are quite over your pranks and that’s why you’ve been sent to me. They knew I would laugh in your face just as I have.

BINK: Only Edmond and Rover are smart enough for this prank. That’s who did it. I’ll have my revenge for this, I swear. No one makes a jester of the prank lord.

-END SCENE-

SCENE 2.4: We see Bink inside Edmond and Rover’s cottage frantically searching through the writing desk and cabinets. Neither of our heroes seem to be around and one of the windows has been broken into.

BINK: Make a fool of me will you? Tell me of false love? Prank the prankster? I don’t think so, Edmond! Rover! I’ll get you. But how? What here matters? Rover’s scripts? I could burn them, yet I do not have a match. Edmond’s bed? Yet I am not strong enough to move that and Meka is not with me. So, then, what? What?!

[Bink seems to be giving up hope and then he looks up to see the glow of the lantern.]

Ah, I’ll steal that. How else will they see at night? A real robbery, I’ll make it. There, now I’ll leave and they’ll always wonder if there house is safe. Who would steal a lantern? Why would they? Forever these questions will haunt there lightless nights. They’ll never feel safe again. Ha! And now I leave.

[Bink Attempts to climb back through the window but he cuts himself on some of the grasp, yelps, and drops the lantern. It shatters and fire begins to lick up from the wooden floorboards.]

BINK: Fire! Oh, no, I’ll catch. Forget the prank, forget them, I hope they cry at the sight of a burnt home. I’ll have to leave now or else be scortched.

[Bink runs off as the fire begins to consume everything in the house.]

-END SCENE-

-END ACT 2-

ACT 3

SCENE 3.1: It is night and we find Edmond and Rover lying on the ashes of their once home. Edmond is staring up at the stars and Rover is dozing off beside him, hidden away in his shell.

EDMOND: I guess we did need a lantern.

ROVER: Not really, we’re still here and we’re still going to fall asleep.

EDMOND: That’s true. Do you think it was Bink?

ROVER: Yes.

EDMOND: I guess we shouldn’t have made fun of him.

ROVER: It was his own undoing. All we did was tell him someone liked him.

EDMOND: True. It still seems mean, though.

ROVER: Just because something is mean doesn’t mean you don’t have to do it.

(Pause)

EDMOND: Sleeping on the ground is a lot like sleeping in a bed.

ROVER: I told you, there isn’t much of a difference.

EDMOND: Why would we need beds then? Comfort?

ROVER: Well, if we never had comfort would we know the difference?

EDMOND: No, I guess.

ROVER: Then why would we have made beds in the first place?

EDMOND: I’m not sure.

ROVER: Because other people have beds.

EDMOND: What about those people? Why did they make beds?

ROVER: Because they found other people who made beds.

EDMOND: Then what about the first people?

ROVER: It’s just always been that way.

EDMOND: Hmmm… What about what Reeve said?

ROVER: I have no idea what he said and if I had I’m sure I wouldn’t have understood it.

EDMOND: His point seemed too symbolic. I guess your right then.

ROVER: Of course I’m right.

[They lay back and enjoy the stares for a minute.]

EDMOND: We’ll have to buy everything back again won’t we?

ROVER: Well, we can’t be the only people without a home or things.

EDMOND: Why not?

ROVER: Because we wouldn’t live here.

EDMOND: You don’t think we’d be able to live here if we didn’t do what other people wanted us to do?

ROVER: It’s not that they want us to do anything it’s just that they do those things. They won’t care if we do nothing but why would we, who do nothing, live with people who do things?

EDMOND: I guess it’d be better to go live with people who do nothing too.

ROVER: And would you want to do that?

EDMOND: No, I like being here with these people and doing their things.

ROVER: So, because they do those things and have the things they have we’ll have to do those things and we’ll have to get the same things they have. Else we wouldn’t be ourselves.

EDMOND: Right.

[Edmond turns to his side and nudges Rover. The turtle comes out of his shell.]

EDMOND: Rover?

ROVER: Yes?

EDMOND: Do you know why we’re here?

ROVER: I guess the same reason lanterns are.

EDMOND: I see.

ROVER: I need to sleep now, Edmond.

EDMOND: Okay. Goodnight then.

ROVER: Goodnight.

-END SCENE-

-END ACT 3-

-END PLAY-